Michael Gerard Bauer: I COULDA BIN A SAMURAI!

Gidday! from beautiful Brisbane Australia.

What's the weirdest thing you wanted to be when you were little?

When I was a kid I never thought of being a writer, I wanted to be a Samurai warrior and failing that, a Ninja. So while other future writers might have been sharpening their pencils and honing their writing skills when they were little, I was running around my backyard with my homemade wooden samurai sword, leaping and screaming and attacking the clothesline.

Sadly my samurai dreams ended when a careers advisor at school asked me, 'Michael if you could be anything in the world, in your heart of hearts, what would you be?' Naturally I replied, 'Samurai Warrior!' I remember the careers man staring at me like I'd just stepped off the alien mother-ship. Then he looked at my report card and said the most devastating thing I'd ever heard up to that point. 'Michael,' he said, 'unfortunately you have taken the wrong subjects to be a Samurai – I think you should consider Accounting.' I didn't.

It was at University that I really fell in love with words and stories and dreamt of becoming a writer of some kind. When my first attempts at writing were rejected, I figured it meant I was no good, so I quit. Luckily, later in life I got a second chance.

So for what they're worth, here are my two pieces of advice to anyone who wants to be a writer.

Firstly, anyone can want to be a writer, but real writers have to write something.

Secondly don't be pathetic like I was and give up when you get rejections. People say you should follow your dreams. I say you should stalk your dreams - track them down, corner them and don't take 'no' for an answer. (NB Don't stalk people. Stalking people is bad. It's also illegal and time consuming when you should be writing.)

These days I wouldn't swap being a writer for all the Samurais in Japan. For me at least, the pen really is mightier than the sword.

Cheers Michael

Michael Gerard Bauer
Author of Don't Call Me Ishmael